Story Archive (Page 5 of 12)

I had heard about frequent use of this odd phrase but the first time I actually encountered it in its natural surrounding it took me by surprise. „How’re ye doin’,“she said to me. Casually, kneeling on the shops floor, busy arranging the seams of dresses. „Fine,“ I said a bit to loud for my taste. „And how are you doing,“ I asked which obviously took her by surprise in turn. „Fine, too,“ she replied smiling a bit too dramatically for my taste. We turned away from each other and I observed her frowning at me in the reflection of the mirror in front of me. Took a lesson with my New England friends. The basics of how’re-ye-doing. Got quite relaxed with the issue. However, at various occasions I didn’t quite get that someone had said it again my ears not being accustomed to the accent for long enough. The phrase like a caterpillar crawls from the lips of the girl that packs my bag in the supermarket. Twists itself into my ear. Loses vowels and consonants on its way. „Owyedin“ „Pardon.“ „How ye doin.“ „Oh sure – how’re ye doin.“ „Wijistoneamakyehappe“ „Sorry?“ I hadn’t expected another caterpillar. The girl looked a bit astonished by my wrong reply, afraid of having done something wrong, be sacked for it and her at least three children having to live on her husband’s minimum wage only. „We just wanna make ye happy.“ Her surprise mixes with fear mixes with despair. Phrases learnt by heart sound so sterile when repeated. The caterpillars have eaten their way deep into my brain by now. I am unable to deal with two of them. I grab my credit card from the cashier and my shopping bag from the girl avoiding to look into her friendly wide open eyes. „Wedoeverythingforyou.“ the third caterpillar smashes on the ground a few feet behind me. I turn around in a safe distance. „Four children and no husband,“ I say to myself and decide to have another lesson. How’re-ye-doin for advanced.